Ego, who is married to Niyi Ogbaro, was
a back-up singer for masked musician,
Lagbaja. The couple relives their seven-
year-old marital experience
How did you meet and what was the
attraction?
Ego: I met him through a friend of mine
who is his younger brother. We were
very close, he introduced me to him and
I liked him. I had been seeing him but
we actually started talking at a friend’s
party. He was in school then and the
relationship was more or less platonic.
We drifted apart but met again, started
dating for five years before getting
married.
Niyi: We just clicked the moment we
met. I was in school, far away from
where she was. There were no cell
phone and we could not keep in touch.
When we met again, I started wooing
her afresh and she did not give me any
difficulty because I was too much for
her to resist. When I married her, all my
friends were saying how lucky! They said
she would be singing for me in the
house but she has not. She is hoarding
her voice and waiting for me to bribe
her first.
What is the experience of being a
manager to your spouse?
Ego: He became my manager after I
went solo in 2006. He does the
administrative job for the band. The
experience is good because if I come
home tired after a show, he knows the
reason why I am tired. The fact that he
understands what I do and supports me
makes the job a little bit easier.
Niyi: I enjoy being her manager. But
when one is managing a celebrity, one
has to be hard because they are
eccentric. As her husband, I make sure
there is a clear demarcation between
work and home.
What do you do to make life easy at
home?
Ego: He wakes up very early and
prepares breakfast before I am up. I
am the kind of person who enjoys food
more when it is prepared by somebody
other than me.
Niyi: Just being my wife is enough. I
like to cook a lot. Once in a while, I
serve her breakfast in bed.
Did your parents raise any objection to
the inter-tribal marriage?
Ego: Our parents are broad-minded. My
father is Igbo and he married a Yoruba
woman. His parents are Yoruba but his
mother speaks Igbo language fluently.
Did they object to the fact that Niyi was
marrying a musician?
Ego: At first, they were not so sure.
But Niyi was the one getting married
and he knew what he wanted. He
assured them that there was no
problem.
Niyi: Initially my mother and my sister
were sceptical and not comfortable with
the fact that she was a singer. But later,
they accepted her.
How do you cope when Ego goes on
tour for more than one day?
Ego: He is my manager and if I have to
travel, we travel together. If it is
something that I have to go alone for
whatever reason, I don’t stay more than
a day or two. It is really not an issue.
Niyi: I know the kind of job she does
and the industry. That is not an issue as
long as there is telephone and social
media. We always keep in touch.
With all the men who admired you, why
did you choose to marry Niyi?
Ego: He is somebody I can relate with;
somebody I love and feel comfortable
with. He is my paddy.
How did he propose?
Ego: It was special but not something I
like to disclose.
Niyi: She is the only one who can say
how the proposal went. It is her small
secret.
What is the most romantic gesture you
have ever shown towards each other?
Ego: When we got engaged, he bought
me the biggest birthday card I have
ever seen in my life. He also organised
a surprise party for me and invited
friends I had not seen in years.
Niyi: When she was on tour in Cyprus,
she called me in the middle of the night,
just to hear my voice.
Do you have pet names for each other?
Ego: No. I call him by his name. But on
my phone, I save his name as ‘Bobo mi’
Niyi: I call her ‘Smallie mi’
You grew up in Lagos, is that why you
are married to a Yoruba man?
Ego: Not necessarily. I could have been
married to anybody. If you are the right
person, I don’t care where you are
from.
Niyi: If I was not married to a
musician, I would still have married
somebody in the entertainment
industry. If she is on tour, I have to
cope, knowing that she is not around.
But if my wife were a banker, she would
be in the same town with me and still
close from work by 9pm.
What is the most annoying thing you
have ever done to each other?
Ego: What most men do. They don’t
take extra steps to arrange their shoes
and put their stockings inside the
laundry basket. They just throw their
stuff all over the place.
Niyi: It is annoying when she takes the
remote control from me, or tells me to
drive the car when I am very tired.
When you fight, who apologises first?
Ego: We don’t fight. I can count how
many times we have quarrelled in the
past 15 years.
Niyi: A woman is never really wrong.
The man is still the one who would
apologise at the end of the day.
How do you resolve issues?
Ego: We have different ways of dealing
with issues. But we always talk and play
with each other even though we may be
fighting.
Does he feel threatened when other
guys are all over you?
Ego: I don’t think so. He knows that I
am a tomboy. Most of my friends have
always been guys. That is not an issue
for him because I have never really
given him cause to worry.
Niyi: I have never felt threatened by
her male admirers. Marriage is really
based on trust. I know the kind of
person she is and I understand and
respect the fact that in her profession,
she is bound to have admirers.
How did the rumours that you dated
Lagbaja affect your relationship?
Ego: We were just making fun of them
and laughing about the rumours.
Niyi: Lagbaja and I joked about it all the
time. I met a woman who even swore
that she attended the wedding between
my wife and Lagbaja. It was ridiculous!
Niyi was shot sometime last year, how
was that period for you?
Ego: It was crazy. It was when I knew
what being in shock meant. I had
already changed to go to bed when his
friend called and broke the news to me.
I just became numb. When I got to the
hospital, they asked me for the number
plate of our car that the robbers stole. I
tried but could not remember it.
Niyi: I thought about her as I lay
wounded, wondering if she would be
able to cope.
Are you still planning to have two
children?
Ego: Yes. I want to have twins at once,
as my first children. That way, I don’t
have to bother with more children.
Niyi: If she wants double twins, I am all
for it.
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